I recently read “Screaming on the Inside: The Unsustainability of American Motherhood” and i’ve been sitting with a lot of thoughts on it. I haven’t had a chance to put those thoughts to words, or have them super organized and eloquent-for whatever reason i just haven’t felt like stringing them all together, so they’re sitting in limbo in my brain and are scattered blurbs on my notes app. Some day though, i’d like to think i’ll get them together. Whether you read it or not is your own business, how you feel about it afterwards is your own business, but it was one I was glad to have gone through if you have any interest. The book is about the author’s idea that american mother’s are held to too high of a standard. It’s a combination of her personal life, a lesson of women’s roles throughout history, a sociological perspective and experiences from other women, a call to action- she really makes an attempt to cover all the bases. Without going in to detail, like i said, of my personal thoughts on the book, I think that it’s a really important discussion that’s imperative for men and women alike to have whether they are parents or not; the standard and expectations of the mother. Everyone has different circumstances, everyone has different expectations or thoughts on the “ideal” mother. Everyone has different capabilities, bodies, financial situations, etc, so it can be really hard to generalize- but i think a big takeaway is that across the board we ned to be kinder to ourselves and judgment serves nobody.

I recently asked on my social media what the hardest part about being a mother was, and was flooded with different responses. From lack of support, the physical change of the body, trying to work, certain developmental hurdles, lack of sleep.. the list could go on, and every single one felt relevant. Every single one i thought.. yup! I get that! Despite everyone’s situation, location, number of kids, age of kids, everything being different, every response was relatable and i felt a sense of empathy for everyone. I really think this is a widespread reaction. I think most of us would say we feel connected through motherhood.

It’s one of the reasons why i love photographing it.

It’s complicated, hard, eye-opening. It opens parts of you that you had no idea existed. We doubt ourselves, sometimes hate ourselves, yet despite all circumstances we love something outside of ourself often times more fiercely and unconditionally than we do ourselves. I think mothers deserve to be celebrated. I think we should be kinder about our bodies our wrinkles, our messy homes, and the choices we make for our families.

I also think, from a creative standpoint, that there isn’t much that is more beautiful than capturing the innate connection, whether it’s the real and messy or something more stylized, all of the moments are worth investing in and all equally amazing. Sometimes these mundane, run-of- the mill days when you have soup on the stove and a baby clinging to you, those days when you’re just trying to get through until dinner, they can all blur together. We can get lost in whatever hard stage we’re going through and it feels like forever and equally like we blinked..

when you put those moments into photos we can always look back and be thankful for them (and thankful for surviving them) And for what it’s worth, i think your real life is beautiful.